Oh, the questions.

Here's some lovely questions mechanics receive. Blatantly stupid or extremely vague, they're whoppers. I present the questions and the responses I would give if they weren't customers. Or if I had a few beers in me.

"I have a Dodge Dakota and until yesterday it worked perfectly. I went shopping and the station, but since I had no battery. They helped me handing me another battery power. I get to my house. From today does not work, only to hear a martilleteo on (I think it\'s motor starting) and I can not do from the truck.Do not want to take it to a shop because I am female and know nothing about cars and I can cheat"

-Nothing wrong with this question. It's just a hilarious auto translation.

"Problem with the 1987 Chevrolet S-10 Pickup. was driving out of nowhere truck engine stopped but all lights stayed on, and the "check gages" light came on, this light has never come on before. i changee the starter , coil, and the moduale. please help!"

- Why do they always go for the battery, starter or alternator first? If the fucking engine shut off, why would you replace the starter? If the starter cranks the engine, fucking leave it alone. That's the starters only job. Turning the engine.

"replacement of fuel filter"

- That's it. No make, model, year or engine. My response would be "Remove old filter. Install new filter. Check for leaks." Bone head.

"Replace spark plugs for 2000 cavalier"

- That's all there was. Is it a statement or a question? I would just love to watch this person attempt the job. Seeing their reaction when the plug wires break because they haven't been changed since Christ was a corporal, stripping the threads in the cylinder head, not gapping the plugs before installation...

"Lights in dash and radio are blinking - why?"

- There's a rave going on. Weren't you invited?

"smells like something is burning"

- Carry a fire bottle.

"I have 86 Mercedes I rebuilt the top end and got it running drove it about twenty miles thy day it was done then the next day I try to start it and it trued to turn then it started click in when turn it over the belts try to turn it over then nothing but click could it be my timing or could it be the starter"

- Punctuation, motherfucker! Punctuation! Again, is this a question or a statement? I'm guessing the dipshit got his valve timing wrong and it's an interference fit engine (meaning the valves and pistons get together when valve timing isn't 100%) and has a shit load of bent valves. That's an expensive lesson.

"need a fuel tank diagram for a 1998 chevy/geo tracker 1.6 liter 2 door"

-Seriously? It's a tank. It holds liquid.

"my van keeps shutting off"

- It's supposed to do that when you turn the key off. Don't want the engine running 24/7.

"I have a 95 Caprice Wagon and can\'t get the key into the ignition. What\'s going on?"

- Try using the right key.

"how to change a timing chain in a 1971 buick skylark 350 "

- Easy. Remove the old timing chain and gears, install the new chain and gears. Road test.

"key wont turn in ignition"

- Wrong key or wrong car.

Get off your high horse, pal

Having read some article comments on Yahoo regarding the current nuclear problem in Japan, I present this little gem. And I quote...

" I guess they simply chose to look pass the fact that Japan attacked military instillations and the US nuked cities with civilian women and children. It sickens me that human beings can be so petty and ignorant as such. It just confirms to me the thought that man will eventually be the cause of our own demise simply because we cannot get our heads out of our own asses long enough to come together for the sake of humanity and this planet."

What Mr. High and Mighty here doesn't realize, aside from the fact that his spelling is atrocious, is that Japan was as bad as Germany in WWII. If not worse. Japan slaughtered millions of Chinese civilians during the war and made no effort to treat POWs humanely. It has nothing to do with revenge for Pearl Harbor. Japan had been on a rampage since the mid 1930s. As for the bombing of German and Japanese cities by the USAF and USN I'll paraphrase from the book "The Wrong Stuff" by Truman Smith. "You don't win wars by being the good guy. You win wars by being worse than your enemy." If German and Japan had had the industrial capability to bomb the hell out of the US, they would have done it. Wars are brutal.

I also need to comment on this gentleman's little ditty about "the US nuked cities with civilian women and children..." Further evidence that he doesn't know his WWII history. The atomic bomb was devastating to be sure, but the destruction wrought by "Fat Man" and "Little Boy" pale in comparison to what General LeMay was doing to Japanese cities. People tend to forget that B-29s had been in service in the Pacific theater long before the atomic bombs were considered. Conventional bombing showed mediocre results, so they switched... to incendiary bombs. Japanese cities were mainly built of wood and paper. You do the math. One fire bombing mission created as much destruction (a little more in some cases) as one atomic bomb. Firebombing didn't happen just once or twice, the USAF was doing this nightly. The firebombing of Dresden is considered one of the most horrific things done by the allies, but Dresden was a mere flickering candle to what was being done to Japanese cities.

OK, so I'm wandering off topic. Have any of you expected anything different from me? The quote I posted in the beginning of this post is but one example of something that really pisses me off. The cause is mainly shitty education in the school system when you get right down to it. Any bleach blond bar slut will be able to tell you who Hitler is. Ask that lovely lady why Hitler was a bad person and you'll receive a three letter response at best. "He killed Jews!" Ask this belle how Hitler managed to get into power and you'll get a blank stare. They probably wouldn't even be able to tell you Hitler's first name. They know the important thing, that Hitler was an evil motherfucker, but they don't know how it all happened. Asking our little Tavern Princess why Japan wanted to take over the Pacific would be an exercise in futility and lead to you becoming an asshole. Trust me, it happened to me once.

Hobby and Reality On Converging Courses

My main hobby is virtual aviation. Both flying and controlling. My real life is concerned with the lady I wrote about in the previous post. These two things are likely to converge and touch a nerve with me regarding the same thing. I don't need to describe my problems with the lady again. My hobby of controlling on the VATSIM network is giving me problems though. The ATM at my ARTCC resigned from his position today after a lengthy "witch hunt" by a handful of my fellow controllers. I won't deny their complaints of our ATM not being around much and not having much of an online presence, I have issue with the way they went about airing their grievances. They did almost everything except hang the ATM in effigy. I took neither side as I usually do, but I have lost all respect for those controllers who made up this "lynch mob". Our ATM posted on the message board his resignation for all to see and a few of the mob had the audacity to post well wishes such as "best of luck to you." It disgusts me to no end. This leads to the parallel with the lady in my life.

I'm lazy and a bit of a slob, I'm one of the "working poor" formerly known as the middle class so I don't have much, but I have a very old fashioned sense of duty and honor. I say "sir" and "Ma'am", hold doors for women, help people whenever I'm called on etc. I don't know where the saying came from, but I live by it. "My honor is my loyalty." With the controllers of the mob, they were out for blood and they got it. Then they turned around and wished the ATM well? Two-faced sons-of-bitches is what they are! No loyalty to either side equals no honor! With the lady her infidelity of the past means no loyalty, hence no honor. I'm capable of forgiving people for many things (thank you for that gift Grandpa!) but forgiving someone for such a gross breach of honor is almost impossible for me to do.

A certain lady

This Christmas has been a little weird for me. Over the past year I've been dealing with an ex girlfriend for whom I still carry a torch. We had been tip-toeing around the subject of dating over the summer but never really came to a conclusion. Long ago I had come to realize that I could never date her since I could never trust her due to her not knowing the meaning of the word "fidelity". It had been nine years since we had dated and she told me of at least one occasion when she was unfaithful to here then boyfriend. By that time I had finally admitted to myself that I would never be able to trust her despite the fact that we get along so well. I have never told her about it because it would serve no purpose and would only hurt her. She has told me that I'm the only person she can really talk to about anything. Why, I don't know. When here current relationship fell apart she disappeared for awhile and then eventually contacted me again. I knew at that time that I was only a friend and a bit of a "rebound guy" to her. That was last February. We spent a lot of time together, which was nice, but she was actively seeking a new man on a dating service. Even though I'm perfectly aware that we will never be a couple, it hurts me deeply to know that she doesn't want me. I haven't talked to her much since October and I find myself wishing I didn't talk to her at all because it hurts to hear her say how she's going to her new guy's place. She told me early on that she was just looking for friendship with this guy, but anyone could see through the bullshit. I think she was only trying to keep me from being hurt. Well, it didn't work. I have absolutely no say as to who she is dating and I keep my mouth shut. In fact, I encouraged here to give this guy another try when she started seeing him. That was very, very difficult for me to do, but I thought it was the right thing to do. As much as I still love her, I'm not going to stand in her way. I hate to say it, but if she hasn't changed at all, the new guy will eventually find out the hard way how she can be. I sincerely hope she can remain faithful to this new guy. But I also hope she has picked a guy that's compatible with her. If she's just settling for "close enough" she'll end up disappointed just as she has in previous relationships and it will lead to more infidelity. It's very sad to see this happen over and over again. I also can't bring myself to tell her that she's on her own and that I won't be there to help her if this current relationship of hers falls apart. I simply plan on doing what I do best, and that is just fading away into the background.

I'm Gullible

Good God I am so freakin' gullible sometimes. This weekend has been completely ruined and what stings most is that it's my fault. I've always looked forward to Halloween and especially when it falls on a weekend. Since I work nights I'm usually unable to enjoy Halloween unless it happens to fall on a weekend. Last year I was supposed to have Halloween off, but one of the other mechanics quit which screwed up the service call rotation. I got screwed out of Halloween and found myself fixing a tractor alongside a railroad instead of having a good time. This year I was, again, going to have Halloween off. One of the other mechanics screwed things up and it was looking like I was going to get fucked again. I had plans to spend the 30th (a Saturday) with a lady friend out at the bars looking at all the people who had dressed up for the holiday. I worked ten straight days on call just so I would have this weekend free. I was really looking forward to seeing my friend and had been counting the days. All the while I had in the back of my mind the nagging thought that she'd bail on me. I dismissed it think that she knew what I had gone through to have this weekend free and how important it was to me. This afternoon I got "the call". She couldn't make it. Said she wasn't feeling well enough. Granted she's been ill for the past three weeks, but even my offer to drive to her was kind of shot down. It just reeks of an excuse to get out of it. There was no point in getting angry with her. I just said that I was disappointed and that it would be another two weeks before I was free again. Some friend. So here I sit, plans ruined for the second Halloween in a row and fuming over the whole thing. Halloween will not come on a weekend again until 2015! To say that I'm not even a little pissed off would be a lie. Mostly, I'm pissed at myself for thinking she would actually be here. I am such a fool... Why do I even make plans for anything anymore?